Today's audition ended up being a challenge. A little bit in the technique/singing area, but even more so in the acting area. The woman in charge of hearing the auditions asked if I would "play" with my second piece (Gretchen am Spinnrade, Schubert). She basically gave me permission to do anything I wanted with the idea of having a complete mental breakdown while singing. The accompanist suggested drawing inspiration from Market Street. :)
The result was both expected and liberating - I let go of the sound, the technique came on its own and everything felt more free. I'm not sure if this makes sense exactly, but it's like the truth of the song started to come from within me and was expressed in my completely letting go. Like, crawling on the floor letting go, hands in my hair, on my face... you get the idea. And the expression of truth came from every part of me, not just my face, my eyes, my voice, etc.
This is the kind of holistic training this summer program offers. It was definitely a non-traditional audition for me and I have no idea whether it was really "good" or "bad." But I am certainly intrigued and hopeful about getting in now.
My broader point, though, is what holds us back from full freedom of expression when performing (in any capacity) and why do we let it? It wasn't scary to go that far with it (really, it was quite fun!); more like it felt strange because it's not something I would have ever considered appropriate in an audition setting. And maybe crawling on the floor is a bit much for a more traditional audition. However, it certainly beat singing as passionately as I could while feeling awkward about what to do with my hands. Regardless of the outcome from today, I've learned even just a little bit about escaping the audition/performance boundaries we make in our heads.
Love&Harmony,
Erin
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